Top 40 Marriage Quotations

"Is it better for a woman to marry a man who loves her than a man she loves. "
-- Anonymous

"All marriages are happy. It's living together afterwards that is difficult. "
-- Anonymous

"Getting married is very much like going to a restaurant with friends. You order what you want, then when you see what the other fellow has, you wish you had ordered that."--
Anonymous

"It's not as great a day for the bride as she thinks. She's not marrying the best man. "
-- Anonymous

"Marriage is a romance in which the hero dies in the first chapter. "
-- Anonymous

"Many a man owes his success to his first wife and his second wife to his success."--
Jim Backus

"Marriage is not a ritual or an end. It is a long, intricate, intimate dance together and nothing matters more than your own sense of balance and your choice of partner. "
-- Amy Bloom

"Marriage has no guarantees. If that's what you're looking for, go live with a car battery."--
Erma Bombeck

"I married the first man I ever kissed. When I tell this to my children they just about throw up. "
-- Barbara Bush

"All tragedies are finished by a death, all comedies by a marriage."--
Lord Byron

"If variety is the spice of life, marriage is the big can of leftover Spam. "
-- Johnny Carson

"If you are afraid of loneliness, don't marry. "
-- Chekhov

"Marriage is an adventure, like going to war. "
-- G. K. Chesterton

"The most happy marriage I can imagine to myself would be the union of a deaf man to a blind woman. "
-- S. T. Coleridge

"I never married because I have three pets at home that answer the same purpose as a husband. I have a dog that growls every morning, a parrot that swears all afternoon and a cat that comes home late at night. "--
Marie Corelli

"I'd marry again if I found a man who had 15 million and would sign over half of it to me before the marriage and guarantee he'd be dead within a year. "
-- Bette Davis

"Marriage is a lottery in which men stake their liberty and women their happiness. "
-- Madame de Rieux

"Whatever you may look like, marry a man your own age - as your beauty fades, so will his eyesight."--
Phyllis Diller

"There's only one way to have a happy marriage and as soon as I learn what it is I'll get married again."--
Clint Eastwood

"Men marry women with the hope they will never change. Women marry men with the hope they will change. Invaribly they are both disappointed."--
Albert Einstein

"A man's wife has more power over him than the state has."--
Ralph Waldo Emerson

"Keep your eyes wide open before marriage, half shut afterwards. "
-- Benjamin Franklin

"A man is incomplete until he is married. After that, he is finished. "
-- Zsa Zsa Gabor

"I'm an excellent housekeeper. Every time I get a divorce, I keep the house. "
-- Zsa Zsa Gabor

"I don't think I'll get married again. I'll just find a woman I don't like and give her a house. "
-- Lewis Grizzard

"If you want to sacrifice the admiration of many men for the criticism of one, go ahead, get married. "
-- Katharine Hepburn

"Marrying a man is like buying something you've been admiring for a long time in a shop window. You may love it when you get it home, but it doesn't always go with everything else in the house. "
-- Jean Kerr

"I was married by a judge. I should have asked for a jury. "
-- Groucho Marx

"Politics doesn't make strange bedfellows, marriage does. "
-- Groucho Marx

"Eighty percent of married men cheat in America. The rest cheat in Europe. "
-- Jackie Mason

"Marriage is three parts love and seven parts forgiveness of sins. "
-- Langdon Mitchell

"A good marriage is at least 80 percent good luck in finding the right person at the right time. The rest is trust. "
-- Nanette Newman

"When marrying, one should ask oneself this question: Do you believe that you will be able to converse well with this woman into your old age? "
-- Friedrich Nietzsche

"Before marriage, a man will lie awake all night thinking about something you said; after marriage, he'll fall asleep before you finish saying it. "
-- Helen Roland

"By all means marry; if you get a good wife, you'll be happy. If you get a bad one, you'll become a philosopher."--
Socrates

"Some of us are becoming the men we wanted to marry. "
-- Gloria Steinem

"I've yet to be on a campus where most women weren't worrying about some aspect of combining marriage, children, and a career. I've yet to find one where many men were worrying about the same thing. "
-- Gloria Steinem

"Loves seems the swiftest, but it is the slowest of all growths. No man or woman really knows what perfect love is until they have been married a quarter of a century. "
-- Mark Twain

"Marriage is a great institution, but I'm not ready for an institution. "
-- Mae West

"Men marry because they are tired; women because they are curious. Both are disappointed."
-- Oscar Wilde

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Top 40 Marriage Quotations

Marriage & Wedding