Home
>
Marriage & Wedding
>
Secrets to Controlling Your Man

Secrets to Controlling Your Man

Ben* has been happily married for 19 years. He recently told me the prime reason he married his wife is because, "She was the only girl I dated who could control me."

I had no idea what he was talking about. I don't know many people, men or women, who enjoy being controlled.

"What do you mean?" I asked.

"I dated a lot of girls, some of them pretty seriously. I was actually close to being engaged to one of them, but I didn't go through with it because she couldn't control me.

But my wife Christine* could. If I wanted to go out with my friends, she'd say, 'Have fun,' and that was it.

It was such a change from the other girls I dated, who used to give me a hard time, wanted to know where I was going and why they couldn't come with me. I went out for a while with one girl who actually said, 'Okay, but now you owe me' when I wanted to go to a wrestling match with a buddy. It was a major turn-off.

But Christine couldn't care less. Whenever I told her I wanted to go out without her, she'd just smile at me and say, 'Have fun.'"

"How exactly was that controlling you?" I asked. "You got what you wanted."

"Yeah," he said, "But as soon as I went out, I missed her. I knew she wasn't sitting around waiting for me to call. I didn't know what she was doing. And since she didn't give me grief about going out, I didn't feel like I'd made prison break. I ended up wishing I was with her, instead of with my friends."

Lest you think this is sexist, put yourself in Ben's place: Who would you be more attracted to? A guy who calls you three times a day, makes demands on your time, and harasses you when you want to go out with your friends? Or a guy who calls once a day (or a couple of times a week), asks you what you'd like to do over the weekend, and tells you to have fun when you want to go out with your friends?

Wouldn't you want to see the second guy more often?

The lesson here is, if you want a relationship with somebody, you must give him air. Give him his freedom. (It doesn't matter if you have nothing else to do except pre-treat the meatball stains on your blouse, keep it to yourself.) Smile and tell him to have a ball. Then let him wonder how you'll spend your time off.

Is it scary? Sure, it's scary! What if he meets another woman while he's scarfing down nachos at the local tavern? Well, what if he does? He's obviously not the right guy for you, and it's better to know that sooner than later.

But consider this: What if he goes out and notices the happy couples and wishes he were with you instead of his friends? What if it dawns on him that the unattached girls hanging out at the bar can't compare to the woman he really wants (you!)?

What if he spends the night thinking of you, missing you, wondering what you're doing and who you're with? Thinking about what a breath of fresh air you are, a woman who's secure enough to do her own thing and give him some time on his own?

What if?

*Names have been changed.

Terry Hernon MacDonald is the author of "How to Attract and Marry the Man of Your Dreams." Visit her website at http://www.marrysmart.com

professional home cleaners Highland Park ..

In The News:

Friendly text conversations about BBQs and social events can lead to WEEX gold trading scams that target older adults with fake investment opportunities.

California company Skyeports creates self-healing glass spheres from Moon regolith that generate solar power and support plant growth for sustainable lunar living.

Cleafy researchers discover fake VPN streaming app Mobdro Pro that installs Klopatra banking Trojan, giving attackers full control over Android devices.

Police departments across the U.S. and Canada are adopting virtual reality training to better prepare officers for high-pressure, real-world situations.

House Bill 469 would prevent AI systems from owning property, serving as executives, or gaining legal personhood in Ohio under Representative Thaddeus Claggett's proposal.

Public voter records expose retirees' personal details to election scammers who create targeted cons using names, addresses, and voting history data.

Instead of fearing what comes next with artificial intelligence, think outside the box. Here are high-earning AI jobs that don't require a computer science degree.

OpenAI CEO Sam Altman says polite words like "please" and "thank you" cost millions annually, while direct prompts may improve ChatGPT accuracy by several points.

Chattee Chat and GiMe Chat exposed intimate conversations and photos, revealing users spent up to $18,000 on AI companions before the breach.

New Instagram parental controls allow families to manage teen screen time and content limits through the Family Center with stricter safety settings.

Third-party security breach at Discord exposes sensitive user information including government IDs, highlighting cybersecurity risks from external service providers.

Survey of 1,000 students shows teens using AI for personal relationships while two-thirds of parents remain unaware of their children's AI usage.

Cybersecurity experts warn about a ShadowLeak vulnerability that weaponized ChatGPT's Deep Research agent to steal personal data from Gmail accounts through hidden commands.

Tesla's Full Self-Driving system faces federal investigation following 58 reports of crashes, with six vehicles running red lights before colliding with other cars.

The Fox News AI Newsletter brings you the latest developments on artificial intelligence, with news on OpenAI moving to soon allow erotica for adult users.

Eric Schmidt alerts that hackers can reverse-engineer AI models to bypass safety measures, citing examples like the jailbroken ChatGPT variant called DAN.

Cybercriminals exploit Microsoft Teams through impersonation, malicious links and fake profiles to gather intel and deliver ransomware to personal and work devices.

Google, Dior, Allianz and dozens of other companies lost sensitive customer data in Salesforce-related breaches affecting millions of records across multiple sectors.

Apple launches iOS 26 with new Preview app that combines document editing, PDF annotation and scanning features into one streamlined iPhone experience.

New AI road monitoring system uses sensor-embedded fabric to predict infrastructure problems, potentially reducing maintenance costs and traffic disruptions for cities.

Holiday charity scams target retirees through lookalike organization names, untraceable payment requests, and data broker information to steal donations.

The Federal Trade Commission says criminals are posing as IRS agents, law enforcement officers or other officials, often over the phone or online, to steal thousands of dollars at a time.

AI phishing scams now use voice cloning and deepfake technology to trick victims, but Kurt "CyberGuy" Knutsson reveals warning signs to watch for.

Inversion Space unveils Arc, a reusable reentry vehicle that can deliver up to 500 pounds of cargo from orbit to anywhere on Earth in under an hour.

Red flags like processing fees, urgent countdowns and requests for full Social Security numbers expose fraudulent settlement sites targeting consumers.

Secrets to Controlling Your Man

Marriage & Wedding