Tina Turner asked an important question in the title of her hit song; What's Love Got To Do With It? Yes love is important but love don't pay the bills. It is not be enough to be "in love." Couples must have the basic skills necessary for building and enhancing the relationship over time. Lasting marriages require partners who are committed to respecting one another, who have gained knowledge about what makes marriage work, and who have developed skills that will enhance rather than deteriorate the relationship.
It is mind boggling that so many spend countless hours planning for the great wedding day. That's right; it is only for one day; a mere drop in the ocean of time. Here today, gone tomorrow; then what? It is just plain ignorant to spend numerous weeks and even months planning for the wedding that last a day and ignore the marriage that is expected to endure for a lifetime. It makes good sense then, to spend at least an equal amount of time preparing for married life. By reading this article, you have taken the first step toward increasing your awareness. I applaud you.
Whenever I perform a wedding ceremony, it usually includes these words:
Do you promise to love, honor, cherish, and protect him/her, forsaking all others and holding only unto him/her according to God's holy law; and thus pledge your faithfulness.
It is disconcerting that nearly half of all married couples regretted uttering those profound words and have since divorced. I believe that the most egregious mistake these couples made was not spending enough time seriously planning for a lifetime together in marriage. Though most couples do claim to take their wedding vows seriously, often what has been disregarded is really getting to know each other on a level beneath the surface.
Women, particularly, seem to approach marriage from a fantasy "happy-ever-after" mentality. We do not seem to realize that what we think we "see" is not perfect reality. And, what we think we feel is related to what we think we see. In other words, we tend to approach marriage with a distorted perception of what married life will be like. In a way, it can be analogized to an adolescent girl who always wanted a baby until she actually had one and the reality of parental responsibility ferociously slapped her in the face; or the teen young man who didn't understand that as soon as he hit adulthood, the system would relentlessly seek child support payments from him for each child he has fathered.
Keep in mind that who you marry will have a dramatic impact on all aspects of your life; spiritual, emotional, mental, and physical health. Marriage is serious business and should be given serious thought. It is not optional, it is obligatory. Take a long and hard look before you leap.
Rev. Saundra L. Washington, is an ordained clergywoman, social worker, and Founder of AMEN Ministries http://www.clergyservices4u.org. She is also the author of two coffee table books: Room Beneath the Snow: Poems that Preach and Negative Disturbances: Homilies that Teach. Her new book, Out of Deep Water: A Grief Healing Workbook, will be available soon.
monthly home cleaning Glencoe ..Think your bridal gown is the most important garment you'll... Read More
So you've been in that perfect relationship for some time... Read More
All brides want to be beautiful on their wedding day,... Read More
My parents gave me this advice about marriage. They have... Read More
Getting married is one of the most stressful events anyone... Read More
As mens wedding rings become more and more popular mens... Read More
The invitation is the first impression of the type of... Read More
According to a survey conducted in 2003 by Bride's magazine,... Read More
The groom traditionally plans the honeymoon. However, most brides prefer... Read More
Choosing who should walk down the aisle with you is... Read More
Weddings are made in heaven, they say, but they have... Read More
Your Wedding Favors are a little bit of your wedding... Read More
You are engaged and one of the most important days... Read More
The Arizona Inn is just the place that you are... Read More
Caricature entertainment will make your wedding celebration stand out and... Read More
Selecting a wedding ring isn't as easy as it looks.... Read More
Healthy marriages require time, attention, energy, and vigilance. It's not... Read More
One of the most important steps in planning your wedding,... Read More
Brides looking to stay on top of their wedding plans... Read More
The tempo of the music begins to rise. Drums begin... Read More
How do you react if your spouse announces "I want... Read More
Marrying for love, financial security and/or companionship does not guarantee... Read More
Your wedding is supposed to be the most important day... Read More
Preparing for a wedding, large or small, is overwhelming! A... Read More
As the story goes, a Cherokee elder was sitting with... Read More
express cleaning service Des Plaines ..Overwhelmed is a common feeling a bride-to-be experiences as she... Read More
The job of choosing the right wedding cake style is... Read More
Weddings are memorable events couples and their families want to... Read More
There are many great options to consider for letting your... Read More
Inviting your possible guests on your wedding day can be... Read More
He's proposed, and most likely you're flashing your new engagement... Read More
The extravagance of weddings is a popular topic. We blame... Read More
Perhaps the biggest worry of a bride-to-be, is picking out... Read More
Your big day is now over all the stress of... Read More
Undoubtedly, the groom will want to choose a few good... Read More
The great day has come and gone, and you are... Read More
Congratulations! You have found the man of your dreams and... Read More
Thousands of years ago, the Celts, a group of independent... Read More
When you're married, the boundaries between yourself and your spouse... Read More
The kids are yelling, the dog is barking, and you... Read More
Hearing that your cheating spouse is "in love" with someone... Read More
As we hear the music begin to play the Bridal... Read More
Wedding favors have evolved over time. Wedding favors today combine... Read More
If you've been around long enough, you're aware of the... Read More
Most brides become obsessed with throwing the perfect wedding. The... Read More
"Presence is more than just being there," states Malcolm S.Forbes.... Read More
When it comes to your wedding services alone, nobody wants... Read More
If you're getting married, a Bridal Show is a great... Read More
Honeymoon is the most wonderful time of every couple's life.... Read More
Many of the Jewish wedding traditions are derived from ancient... Read More
Marriage & Wedding |