Home
>
Marriage & Wedding
>
Whats a Goldfish Doing at a Wedding?

Whats a Goldfish Doing at a Wedding?

Time was when you'd open a wedding invitation you'd find an understated high quality piece of parchment, with an uncompromisingly clear font, requesting, ever so formally, the honour of your presence.

Then came radical changes, described by those in the know as, giving the wedding back to the people. The creation of the ubiquitous Civil Marriage Celebrant ? and anything goes era.

Stealthily at first came sneaking on to the front page of the invitation miniscule wedding bells, intertwining wedding rings and peaceful doves with their wings folded as if wondering what the heck they were doing there.

Traditionalists ? and those too poor to follow the trend ? cried out against this bad taste. Nor were they wrong to fear the full thrust of indulgence to come. Invitations, masquerading as old time scrolls, and delivered by Knights right from King Arthur's court, began to appear at suburban doors. Following the Knights came Wizards from Ali Baba's enchanted cave.

There is no saying where all this would end, when the PC was born and stemmed the tide.

Overnight, so it seems, the excesses transformed themselves into cottage industry, and the traditionalists who had howled at the excess engendered by the coming of the Civil Marriage Celebrant could only stare in horror at the shambles created by the advent of the PC and its companion, the Bubble Jet printer.

Out the window went the parchment and the honour of your presence. Taking it's place was a piece of brown recycled paper, with some unrecognizable font, proclaiming cheerily, "Jim and I are getting married, come and have some fun with us next Sunday."

"Fun?" my husband of 40 odd years snorted. "They're getting married to have fun?" Being something of an etymologist (fancier of words for the rest of us) he began to thumb the well-worn dictionary to find out what fun meant and when he'd had it last. But that's another story.

Getting back to the invitations, and the appearance of computers, the wedding bells and the hearts and rings and flowers were given a swift shrift. Instead we puzzled at wedding invitations covered with cats, dogs, butterflies and yes, the latest one, two gold fish.

There they were on the envelope, swimming demurely side by side on the sea of white, while the invitation itself was awash with them. It took an hour, plus a strong magnifying glass before I could decipher the words.

Bring no gifts, was the first bit of welcome information I fished out of the jumble. We have everything we need. We have each other. Oh, the naivet? of infatuation! "But if you would like to bring a gift," continued the missive, "please bring something for our goldfish."

About the Author

Vlady is one of Australia's longest serving Civil Marriage Celebrants. She is the author of 'The Complete Book of Australian Weddings' and 'The Small Organisation Handbook'.

Visit her at http://www.vlady-celebrant.com

insured cleaning company Deerfield ..

In The News:

New survey reveals 78% of parents fear AI scams targeting their kids, yet nearly half haven't discussed these threats. Learn why this dangerous gap exists.

Chrome now autofills passport and driver's license info automatically. Google's latest browser update adds official document support with encryption and user control.

Scammers impersonate Department of Veterans Affairs employees claiming veterans owe money, but real VA communications only direct to VA.gov or official channels.

The AltoVolo Sigma hybrid-electric aircraft flies 500 miles at 220 mph while operating 80% quieter than helicopters, featuring safety systems and compact design.

Google search scam alert: fake customer service numbers can give scammers remote control of your phone. Learn how to spot these traps and protect yourself.

Electric vehicles overtake gas cars in total CO2 savings after just two years of driving, with emissions benefits growing over time as power grids get cleaner.

Louvre Museum reportedly used "Louvre" as password for surveillance system during $100M jewel heist. Learn how weak passwords put even famous institutions at risk.

Bipartisan AI jobs bill from Sens. Hawley and Warner would require companies to report AI-related layoffs and hiring to Department of Labor quarterly.

Joe A. from Shelton, Connecticut, lost $228,000 to a ZAP Solutions cryptocurrency investment scam after his divorce, highlighting rising online fraud.

AI-powered autonomous trucks from Waabi and Volvo target U.S. freight driver shortage with Level 4 self-driving technology and NVIDIA computing platform integration.

Survive flight disruptions with expert travel tips: Book early morning flights, download airline apps and know your refund rights during service cuts.

Apple's iOS 26.1 update delivers major security fixes, performance boosts and enhanced privacy controls for your iPhone. Discover why updating now protects your data.

Russian hackers use fake CAPTCHA tests to spread dangerous malware targeting governments and journalists. Learn how to protect yourself from these deceptive attacks.

Stay up to date on the latest AI technology advancements and learn about the challenges and opportunities AI presents now and for the future.

Miami-Dade debuts America's first autonomous police SUV with AI cameras, drone deployment and real-time crime detection in groundbreaking law enforcement pilot.

Bank impostor scams cost Americans $2.9 billion as criminals use AI voices and caller ID spoofing to steal life savings. Learn nine essential fraud protection tips.

Foreign-owned apps secretly harvest personal data from seniors, making them prime targets for scams. Learn how to protect your privacy and stop data brokers today.

Sens. Josh Hawley and Richard Blumenthal introduce bipartisan GUARD Act to protect minors from AI chatbots through mandatory age verification and disclosure requirements.

Ghost-tapping scammers exploit wireless technology to drain accounts through small transactions, but RFID-blocking wallets and transaction alerts can protect you.

French pilot project demonstrates wireless charging roads that can deliver over 300 kilowatts of power to EVs while driving, potentially eliminating range anxiety.

YouTube's Ghost Network spreads information-stealing malware through thousands of fake videos offering cracked software, using compromised accounts and fake engagement.

Protect your privacy by disabling your smart TV microphone. Most TVs have hidden mics that listen even when voice commands are off. Learn quick steps to stop unwanted audio capture.

SessionReaper vulnerability hits Magento and Adobe Commerce stores, compromising 250+ sites in one day. Hackers steal data and hijack shopping sessions.

Master essential parental controls and digital safety tools to protect your kids online. Learn screen time limits, location settings and privacy controls every parent needs.

Cybersecurity expert shares six essential steps to protect against dark web threats, including data removal services, password managers and antivirus software.

Whats a Goldfish Doing at a Wedding?

Marriage & Wedding